The Official Ultrakids Website
 

For the second time in my life, I am put on a chain mail that I have nothing to do with. It was some kids from New Jersey complaining to each about the need to get a Jeopardy answer right and to stop insulting his sister, or something like that.

Thanks to Microsoft Outlook, I was able to filter all their replies into a second junk mail folder.  But slightly out of curiosity, I read a couple of them as they came in.

The kids were obviously starting to get annoyed with the chain (as I mentioned, this is the second time). They start posting messages like "This is the last message," then someone else would reply and say "No, this is the last message," and so on. Then one kid, frustrated, drops a curse word.

I couldn't believe my eyes.

 
 

Warning: the following banter is a total waste of time to read. The following is just to show how I practice my personal style of writing.

Something strange is afoot. Afoot? That would smell. Please put your sock and shoe back on. In fact, better put them on for both feet. Afeet? No, I don’t think that’s a word. What does afoot mean anyway? Let’s check the thesaurus. With Microsoft Word, it’s as easy as a click of a button….which it is.
    Afoot is synonymous with the following: happening, going on, occurring, taking place, up (hey, that’s a Pixar movie coming out), in the works, and stirring. Ooh, stirring. A monster is stirring. A monster is a foot, I mean, afoot. A foot monster wouldn’t be that scary. Unless it was a really big foot. Then it would stomp on all of us. But it would be easy to defeat because all we have to do is destroy its big toe. Did you know that without your big toe your balance would completely give away? I guess a foot monster isn’t so bad after all.
    Now, if the monster was really afoot, not a foot but afoot…you know what I mean…that would be scary because there would be no definition for what the monster is. It might be dragon. It might be a cockroach. We wouldn’t know until we saw it. But it might be a cockroach, which isn’t that scary. So we’re not actually getting scared by the monster, we’re getting scared because of the suspense the unknown monster brings.
    So it we’re all frightened because it might be a dragon, we should just tell ourselves it is a cockroach. That would annihilate (nice word) all suspense and fear. Of course, we would be very unprepared if it were really a dragon and that would be bad.
 
 

Paul Minitas
Had tendinitis
And then his friends said, "Please delight us
By treating us to dinner tonight
So right
This way, and let us hurry
Before your body we'll need to bury
We're very, very sad, you know
To see such a good friend go
And by the way, who'll be your heir?
We're your only friends, we fear
So won't you split it evenly among us
We'll spend it wisely, oh yes we promise."
But when Peter John said "Fifty percent!
I'll get what I'm due so I can buy a new tent!"
Then Ricky Davis put up a fit.
"I deserve way more than you, lil' twit!"
Marty Cordova
(his nickname was Grover)
Started playing 'Red Rover, Red Rover'
And tackled Ricky and Pete to the ground
"That money's mine so you two I'll pound!"
Then Paul Minitas
Said, "Please don't fightus
It just so happens that tendinitis
Only causes temporary pain."
And all of his friends looked at him in disdain.
"It's not death-threatening," wise Paul explained.

 
 

Paul Minitas
Had gingivitis
And all his friends said, "Please invite us
Over to your house to play
So we could say
Good-bye
Before you die
It was nice knowing you.
Where's all your money going to?"

But Paul Minitas
Said, "It's alrightus.
It happens that my gingivitis
Will not cause any kind of death.
It will only cause some stinky breath
So there's no reason to worry or fear
Although I doubt you even cared
And even if I passed away
You would not get any of my money."


P.S. The last word 'money' is pronounced 'moe-nay,' like Monet. Y'know, the famous artist?

 
The Crimson Sea 05/14/2009
 
  “Who are you?” the elderly woman asked.
    “Jara,” the boy answered.
    “I’ve never seen you here before. How did you learn spell-casting? I’ve never seen a spell-caster do a jump as high as that before.”
    “Uh…I was taught by my uncle.”
    “Whose your uncle?” This lady was getting nosy.
    “You wouldn’t know him,” said Jara. Translation: Stop asking so many questions. The old woman did not get the hint, but then again, things might go bad if she did.
    “Well that’s why I’m asking.” The woman glared at Jara.
    “His name’s Terrik. Lives in eastern Sauderia.”
    “You’re awfully dark to be from Sauderia, Jara,” remarked the woman. Jara winced at the comment. Although he had applied the lotion given to him from Kayla, he was still noticeably darker than the normal Sauderian.
    “My ancestors were both Japafian and Sauderian.” Best explanation possible, he thought.
    “Mm. Are you more Japafian or Sauderian?”
    “Sauderian.” Of course. Why would a Japafian be wandering in Sauderia during the war?
    The woman gave a sigh of contentment. “Well, since you are part Japafian, maybe you could give King Morthan some ‘ideas,’ if you know what I mean.”
    “I don’t know what you mean.”
    “Well think!” she thundered. “You know about Japafia. What are its weaknesses? Any secret tunnels into the city?”
    Jara’s heart thumped rapidly. “I told you, I’m more Sauderian than Japafian. My ancestors know all that stuff, ask them!”
    The lady glared at Jara again. Then she softened. “No matter. You can still help me with my spell-casting.”
    “I really have to go.” Jara turned to leave.
    “Oh but you have to stay…or else.” Jara froze as the cold feel of steel touched his shoulder.
    “Uh okay…if you insist.”
    “I do.”
 
Saber Kid 05/07/2009
 



This was made a couple months before Ultrakids 3. It was a lot of work (especially animating the robot; pain in the neck), but it helped define the special effects for Ultrakids 3.  That explosion is my own special formula; you won't see that anywhere else in the world. Now if only I could remember how to make it...

 
Website Redone! 05/03/2009
 

After days of strenuous labor and toil, the new Ultrakids website is finished! Yes! Finally! All my hard work paid off so you visitors may have a more fulfilled experience whenever you visit this site. You won't believe how much work went into the new site...hours and hours for days after days of hard work...
Actually, I just clicked a button and changed the whole thing in about two seconds. Anyway, what do you think? I think it looks pretty cool. A more dramatic look; fitting for epic tales like those of the Ultrakids...well, not really.
Enjoy!